A Prayer for the Struggling Believer

The full transcript of my recent performance at the All Things Christian Creative Showcase!

Father, help me 

Holy Spirit, do what only you can do and work within 

Let my discernment be as sharp as my trims 

Because currently, I’m struggling to see 

Whether it’s the wind of ruach Elohim or devilish doctrine 

That’s leading me 

I need open eyes to see what can’t be seen 

Vision from the original visionary 

Poor belief systems are the elastic band I keep snapping back to

In this story of a glorious worship night and conference I post 

It only stretches my mind to delete after 24h as I host 

Thoughts that weren’t co-signed by the Holy Ghost 

It’s nuts when life has you on constant ropes 

And each Jab is a reminder of the grueling truth 

Of dying to the old and embracing the new 

Who would’ve thought becoming a new wineskin 

Was such an uncomfortable reality 

Flaunting my flaws on this catwalk of destiny 

Talking the talk whilst questioning integrity 

Still, there’s a beckoning 

Akin to being on the cusp of a grade boundary 

That point blank shows me, deep calls unto deep

To dismantle the pedal stool that keeps my heart from meekness 

To forsake being the rich young ruler and embrace being poor in the spirit 

Like a beggar in the midst of a cold night in Coventry 

As the season prohibits effective blood flow and circulation 

And the mattress is the concrete floor littered with spit, charcoal-looking chewing gums, and rat droppings 

Yet with humility and meekness, they receive 50 pence 

Would I not roll my eyes at another sermon on the fruits of the spirit 

But genuinely take in other believers 

Taking flight by acknowledging every human is of superior value to Christ 

That I would lead the life you called me to live 

Because at the end of it all, when my time here is wrapped up 

When there are no more prayer requests of favor to pray 

There’s no service to ask for another outpour of rain 

There’s no anointing to display again 

We’ll begin just where we started 

You and Me 

The union will be the only thing that matters 

And the one who doesn’t look at the outer appearance but sees the heart 

Will stand and see 

So may I be acutely aware of the love you have for me 

And every person I run into 

May the fear of God balance and temper my walk

Like Maggi Cubes do to stew

More of you 

Less of me 

The prayer isn’t to be seen

In fact, if they see me 

I’ve failed

Lord check my motive 

A broken and contrite heart you will not despise 

Spend my life and reap my family for you 

Let your peace address every crevasse of my trauma 

Teach me discipline is the key to steadfastness 

That there’s no longevity in spiritual highs and vibes

Let the Bible be the living bread I eat 

Feed me with faith, I welcome the fire 

But I pray for an ever-increasing consciousness of the fourth man within 

May my identity not be found in my productivity 

It’s so easy because I fall then I slip then I fall then I slip then I fall then I slip 

But you encouraged me to enter in before I was anything 

You’re the God who takes the beggar from the dunghill

And sits him amongst princes 

You sprinkle your favor upon my diligence and bring me before kings 

Only to remind me who the king of kings is 

Your intelligence bursts my brain 

And so again and again

I cry o Lord 

Fix my gaze on you, like I’m in northern Nigeria 

And the word of God is my lifeline 

I give you my lifetime 

That others would see the donkey that is me 

But cry hosanna in the highest to the one who rides upon it

Worthy of all praise 

May the taste of your name in my life will never grow sour 

More Love, More Power